I wonder if illiterate people get the full effect of alphabet soup?'

Never Is Sometimes Good

X - accept a drink from a urologist. - Erma Bombeck

X - say 'Oops' in the operating room. - Dr. Leo Troy

X - use while sleeping. - Instructions on Conair hair dryer

X - stand between a dog and the hydrant. - John Peers

X - give up. And never, under any circumstances, face the facts. - Ruth Gordon