Old... No Way! Just Be Careful

The trouble with retirement is that you never get a day off. ~Abe Lemons

I Am Old!

Getting older
Old As Dirt!

Just in case you weren't feeling old enough today, this will  certainly change things. Each year the staff at Beloit College in  Wisconsin puts together a list to try to give the Faculty a sense  of the mindset of this year's incoming freshman.  The list changes every year so this one is from about 2003...

The people who are starting college this fall across the nation  were born in 1994.
They have no meaningful recollection of the Reagan Era and   probably did not know he had ever been shot.
They were prepubescent when the Persian Gulf War was waged.
There has been only one Pope in their lifetime.
They were 10 when the Soviet Union broke apart and do not remember anything about the Cold War.
They are too young to remember the space shuttle blowing up.
Tianamen Square means nothing to them.
Bottle caps have always been screw off and plastic.
Atari predates them, as do vinyl albums.

The expression "You sound like a broken record" means nothing to  them.
They have never owned a record player.
They have likely never played Pac Man and have never heard of Pong.
They may have never heard of an 8 track. The Compact Disc was  introduced when they were 1 year old.
They have always had an answering machine.
Most have never seen a TV set with only 13 channels, nor have  they seen a black and white TV.

They have always had cable.
There have always been VCRs, but they have no idea what BETA   was.
They cannot fathom not having a remote control.
They don't know what a cloth baby diaper is, or know about the  "Help me, I've fallen and I can't get up" commercial.
Feeling old Yet? There's more:
They were born the year that Walkman were introduced by Sony.
Roller skating has always meant inline for them.
Jay Leno has always been on the Tonight Show.
They have no idea when or why Jordache jeans were cool.
Popcorn has always been cooked in the microwave.
They have never seen Larry Bird play.
They never took a swim and thought about Jaws.
The Vietnam War is as ancient history to them as WWI, WWII and   the Civil War.
They have no idea that Americans were ever held hostage in Iran.
They can't imagine what hard contact lenses are.
They don't know who Mork was or where he was from. (The correct  answer, by the way, is Ork)
They never heard: "Where's the beef?", "I'd walk a mile for a  Camel," or "De plane, de plane!"
They do not care who shot J.R. and have no idea who J.R. was.
Michael Jackson has always been white.
Kansas, Chicago, Boston, America, and Alabama are places, not   bands...
There has always been MTV.
They don't have a clue how to use a typewriter.
Do you feel old yet? If you do, then pass this on to some other  20 old fogies...but don't send it back to me, I feel old enough